Funny Jokes For Kids

Veterans Joke
When I took my school-age daughters to a lunch with veterans, I told them to ask questions. One of the men said he’d fought in the Korean War, and the girls were so impressed that the eldest wanted to know more: "Did you fight for the North or the South?"

Class Joke
My five-year-old nephew has always happily answered to BJ. That ended when he came home from his first day of school in a foul mood. It seems his teacher took roll, and he never heard his name. "Why didn’t anyone tell me my name was William!?" he complained.

Daughter Joke
Our six-year-old daughter, Terra, has a need to ask questions … lots of questions. Finally, one day, my wife had had it. "Have you ever heard that curiosity killed the cat?" my wife asked. "No," replied Terra. "Well, there was a cat, and he was very inquisitive. And one day, he looked into a big hole, fell in, and died!" Terra was intrigued: "What was in the hole?"

Mother Joke
I sat in the doctor’s waiting room watching a young mother try desperately to control her three loud children. "They’re not a very good advertisement, are they?" she groaned apologetically. A man muttered, "Only if you’re advertising contraceptives."

Teacher Joke
"Where is Pearl Harbor?" I asked my fourth-grade history class. "Here’s a hint: It’s a place where everyone wants to go." One student blurted out, "Candy Land!"

Sister Joke
When my eight-year-old sister came to visit, I took a day off from my job at the Pentagon and showed her the Lincoln Memorial. There she saw a large block of text—273 words long—etched into the monument. "What’s that?" she asked. "Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address," I told her. "If that’s his address, how does he get any mail?"

Girl Joke
I picked up my nine-year-old daughter from school and asked how her day had gone. A few minutes later, I repeated the question, and again a few minutes after that. Instead of annoyed, Ariana was philosophical. "Mom," she said, "your amnesia is my déjà vu."

Mall Joke
I should have known better than to take my four-year-old son shopping with me. I spent the entire time in the mall chasing after him. Finally, I’d had it. "Do you want a stranger to take you?!" I scolded. Thrilled, he yelled back, "Will he take me to the zoo?"

Drink Joke
Our three-year-old daughter was making up a poem when she asked us what rhymed with stop. My husband said, "Think of something that’s cool and refreshing but that Mom and I don’t let you drink." Our daughter knew the answer: "Alcohol!"

Innocent Joke
While my three-year-old grandson was attending a birthday party, his friend’s father sneaked off to take a shower before work. Halfway through, the father heard a tapping on the shower door, followed by the sight of my grandson peering in. Looking around the stall, he asked, "Is my mom in here?"


This post is a compilation of funny jokes for kids.

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